Friday, September 5, 2008

everytimes when i am with my friends i feel okay but when i am alone i started thinking about the past. just now on the way back home, i was thinking about a lot of things. mostly is about him. i think is all about him ba. i dunno why suddenly i will think about the past again le. though i know i have no more feeling for you le. but the hurt that you left on me till now i still can't forget. even when i think of the good memories we had but it eventually ended with the bad memories. those good memories i really wanna treasure it but it bring me nothing but hurt.
from the time we starting getting to know each other better. bickering with each other, irritate each other, calling each other names and the times when we are sat next to each other. those was the starting when i dun even sure of my feeling for you. but it was a great time with you by my side then. then slowly i know that i had fallen for you slowly. though many things happen in between that. during your N level period i was worry for you but i did not dare to contact you. till the first day of my o level. saw you before my paper. and that affected me a lot. i can't concentrate on my paper at all. my whole mind was all about you. till one day when we saw each other again and we started contacting each other again. ever since then i am sure i really love you. no matter how hard i try to ask you go for any outing we had you never agree to go for any one. you dun understand how much i wanna see you and wanna you to go for hose outing.and you never know how worry i am when the N level result was out. and i did not have any courage to ask you how you gt. finally i make up my mind to ask you and no matter how i ask you, you also never give me a answer. sometimes my sms was already very obvious that i like you but why can't you sense it. though you know when my birthday was. you did not even bother wishing my a happy birthday. all i wanna was just a happy birthday but i gt none. you are the one who give me false hope. if you dun have any feeling for me can you dun make me feel that you also have feeling for me. one moment we are very close the next moment everything changes and we behave like stranger.
i know this matter is already the past le. but i really cannot forget about you which i thought i had already did. but i was wrong. i know i am foolish but... i really cannot control my emotion. while reading my past posts. those happy memories really make me smile but it lead me to those bad memories.

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